Thursday, September 10th, 2009...7:59 pm
Why So Glum? 25 Very Good Reasons
Of course young people are happy: They have great bodies, they have lots of sex with other people with great bodies, and — well, do you really need any other reason?
And old people are happy too, because they raked in lots of money during the boom years and now they can live high on their investments while simultaneously bleeding Social Security dry.
The unhappiest group, according to a new Gallup poll, is 45 to 64-year-olds. Here’s the chart:
Why are the middle years so glum? The New York Times asked its readers, who came up with no shortage of theories. Here, my digest of the Times readers’ 25 top reasons that life sucks for the middle-aged:
1. No time to recover financially from current disaster.
2. Baby Boomers are generally dissatisfied.
3. Pissed off that you won’t be as pampered as current seniors are.
4. Older boomers are greeedy job hogs, leaving younger boomers out in the cold.
5. Too busy, plus sad about being anonymous paper-pusher.
6. Responsible for your own well-being as well as that of your kids and parents.
7. Persistent attacks on Social Security.
8. Realize everything you ever believed in is a lie.
9. Not enough healthy, short-term selfishness.
10. You’ve lost your job and you’re too old and expensive to get rehired.
11. Teenage daughters, dying parents, divorcing friends, health problems.
12. Friends domesticated into non-existence.
13. Guilt.
(Are you ready to kill yourself yet?)
14. The high cost of braces and college.
15. Hot young people call you sir (and m’am).
16. Job security undercut by ageism and sexism.
17. Can’t get a freaking date.
18. Realize you will never attain your dreams.
19. Sagging middles and bottoms.
20. Colonoscopies.
21. Realize that reaching material goals doesn’t satisfy deeper needs.
22. Tend to be Mets fans.
23. Resented by younger colleagues.
24. Not as glamorous as you’d like to be.
25. Not only is everything bad now, but it will be worse tomorrow.
Did we miss anything? What do you think makes the middle years the unhappiest age?
Hmm…I really hate to add to this list, but what really irks me is being reminded everywhere I turn how much there is to dread in this age group. But you do it so well and you make me laugh, so I forgive you. But only you.
As more than one person pointed out on the Times site, the 45-64 age group is only a couple happiness points lower than the others, so things aren’t all THAT bad. What was funny to me was how many different reasons for those few points that everyone came up with — I was a lot less happy after reading the piece than I thought I was!
What makes this the unhappiest age? The sad realization that no potion will return our skin to the satiny textures of our youth — when we absolutely took it for granted.
The rest of those very valid points I can deal with by maintaining denial and magical thinking. Try it. It works.
Man, it’s kind of creepy how this list hits the nail on the head for me.
I found special resonance in #1, #8 (although I was a history major in college, so I had a headstart on that one), #14 (I’m paying that orthodontist bastard a very steady $195/month), #20 (I’ve had two and I *hate* them), and, God help me, #22 (I’m looking at *you*, Fred Wilpon and Omar Minaya!).
Did I mention I turn 54 this friday?
26. Gray hair (down under).
Beat that one.
1. Screwed in 2009 by ‘worst job market since 1991’.
2. Also screwed by job market in 1991.
I’m happier now than I’ve ever been! I finally got a decent job, have my own home, am married to the man of my dreams, and I’m thinner than I was in my 20s.
No elderly parents to care for and no children draining my finances. Life is good. : )
Yet the most interesting age-group ?
Although, of course, you’ll find interesting people in all age brackets 😉
None of the above applies to me (I’m 48). What makes me the unhappiest is that the age bracket below me won’t learn any lessons from us and wind up miserable for the same reasons when it’s their turn to be middle aged. Don’t do it young people!!
Advertising execs: Stop with the freaking disgusting commercials that make us look like peeing idiots with no game.