Entries Tagged as 'Travel'

Wednesday, August 20th, 2008

#s105-116: How Not To Vacation Old, Part See Ya Later

This is my last post until after Labor Day because I’m going on vacation. Well, I’m not going on vacation. In the second of eight straight years of paying college tuition, I can’t afford a vacation. But HNTAO is going on vacation. By itself. On a cruise. Except it’s pretending it’s going to Vegas. When […]

Friday, August 8th, 2008

#s94-100: How Not To Vacation Old, Part 2

Okay, in the last installment, we got you carefully and finally out of the house. Whee! But you still have to make it to your vacation destination without acting old. Let’s go: 1. If you’re flying, do not get to the airport three and a half hours ahead of time. Yes, it takes a while […]

Monday, August 4th, 2008

#s84-92: How Not To Vacation Old, Part 1

For the age-challenged, the most difficult part of going on vacation can be getting ready. We’re nervous about leaving home, is the thing. We don’t like being away from all our routines, all our stuff. And then, we worry about what’s going to happen to the place when we’re gone. Here, how not to act […]

Wednesday, July 23rd, 2008

#73: Cancel the Trip to Provence

Peter Mayle’s A Year In Provence hit the bestseller list in 1991, whereupon every American who could afford it rented a villa in the south of France. If you figure that most of those people were at least 30 when they developed their passion for Provence, they’re now nearly 50. And like them, Provence is […]

Monday, July 21st, 2008

#70: No Hovering

Dear Marge, I realize that, in the 396 public bathrooms I’ve visited in the past week on the road, someone else might have been the culprit. But the fact is, the only one I really suspect is you. I know your mom told you that sitting on the seat of a public toilet could give […]

Friday, June 13th, 2008

#13: Unless You're In Nagasaki, Don't Give (Or Ask) Directions

Once, looking for a swimming hole in Maine, a local told me to turn left where the old school burned down. That’s what giving directions is like these days. In this era of Mapquest and GPS, it’s meaningless to tell someone to turn left at the church and go under the railroad trestle and look […]

Thursday, June 12th, 2008

#9: Don't Plan

When old people want to go on vacation to, say, Italy next summer, what do they do? They buy tickets. Book a hotel. Research restaurants and make reservations. They plan, in other words, just like they plan dinner parties for three weeks from Saturday, and buy theatre tickets for Thanksgiving, and make a mammogram appointment […]

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