Friday, September 5th, 2008...12:31 pm
#120: Neutralize Your Crazy Old Sperm
Yes, John McCain, I’m talking to you. Lest you and Cindy decide that a fifth child would provide, ala Palin, a political advantage, I direct your attention to this new study that shows that children of fathers over 55 are more likely to develop bipolar disorder and other mental illnesses. Maternal age, I hasten to point out to all you guys out there who try to blame women for everything, was not a factor.
Finally, a solid reason — beyond, you know, imminent decay and death — for older guys to put some limits on how long they go around spraying out babies. Why anyone would want to make it through the enormous job of raising a family only to go out and raise another one is totally beyond me, unless you’re the kind of guy who wasn’t much involved in raising the first batch of kids and won’t do much about raising the second or third batches either.
Of course, you might believe that your sperm, mutant as it is, still deserves to flourish wherever it finds purchase. If so, I’d appreciate it if you’d go around singing this Monty Python song, if only to give women warning.